The cultural conversations about sex and rap music had me energetically SPENT, and looking for male rappers who center femme pleasure. Here's what I found!
Music is powerful for us individually, and societally. It is a tool of revolution and propaganda, when used intentionally. Melodies change our brain function and sounds have always been used to manipulate the human experience. Music accompanies religion and worship because it is a fundamental tool of communication, entertainment and meaning-making. Our Black future is coming, so it is nice to understand how we can shape our culture towards Reproductive Justice, womanism and liberation for Black people. RJ in practice requires us to culturally care about women and femmes enough to listen to them, believe them and prioritize their pleasure.
Sexuality is an inextricable part of our human experience, the creation of families, and the freedom of Black people from Eurocentric patriarchy and colonization.
Back to music- Music makes culture, and vice versa. I WISH I could do a study on the frequency of sexual language and storytelling present in rap music, or any music genre dominated by Black people. The popular genre for American Black folk has shifted over time from jazz, soul, R&B, hip hop and rap music. The whole while, artists have recorded songs about sex. Rap is the most consumed music of all genres across the world, now and historically dominated by Black men. My cousin in Houston knows every Drake lyric, as do the French, Indonesian, Kenyan, and Palestinian cousins of the world. Without having context on lyrics like “bust it open”, people of all languages and cultures enter to a fantasy land full of Black asses, high hats, bass, luxury, struggle, sex, pain, joy and a nice sample. Without context on how Black Americans reclaimed "nigga", African people are now accepting nigga as a greeting. Is that off? That feels off to me. Our music is unstoppably penetrating the world, and its lyrics are stuck in the global mindset.
I was genuinely surprised by the conversations around the song Wet Ass Pussy (WAP) by Cardi B and Meghan Thee Stallion. The pleasure or orgasm gap suggests that less than 65% of heterosexual women are feeling satisfied, yet their male partners believe they are putting it down! It reminded me that we have come so far for bodily autonomy and expression, and still face major hurdles in our collective consciousness towards acceptance of Black Feminist principles. What conditions that would need to be true to imagine a healthy, liberated Black future? What is appropriate in our own homes? What face do we put on for white company? Do we admit that we like sex, even though we've been shamed and hypersexualized for centuries? Are heterosexual males mindful of their partners' need to feel good and have orgasms? It is intimate partner violence, patriarchy-lite or hardcore toxic masculinity that stifles our needs and refuses our pleasure. Freedom to feel blissful in a collaborative effort, without the air of judgement feels like some kind of liberation.
If the prevailing way that men and women rappers talk about sex is for male pleasure and male gaze, where is the counternarrative? It is in the songs like WAP, that celebrate our pleasure. I’m on the hunt. I wanted to find music about WAP from the male perspective, since their commentary on the song rang the most alarms. Here are 2 that were already in my playlist and have been party favorites for a long time. They give a particular vibe shift to parties, where the spirit of the divine feminine takes over. This is grind time, when the lights are low and the femmes are on the prowl for their next victim. Are there others?
What are your favorite songs by male rap/hip-hop artists that celebrate that WAP for real, not for a human masturbation sleeve?
Plies feat. Tank, “You”
This song is a celebration of consent to me. The chorus is an equitable exchange of everything sexy; mutual sucking and cumming (with exclamation marks so you know it's real). I do not know if the songwriter had exclamation marks, but this lyrics site does, and that makes me laugh. Verse one is the most banal of them all. The lyrics are run of the mill, but still have healthy mentions of female pleasure and consent. “If you want to grab it,” “Hold your legs open for me,” “Let you ride me,” etc. My girls and I can only speculate what “drop that mayonnaise in your salad” means. However, verses two and three get increasingly better. Plies aspires to make his woman moan, make her desire him with the chase, a night of teasing and foreplay with no pressure for sex. Attentive men make for wet pussies, and this song is all about YOU.
Twista feat. Erika Shevon, “Wetter”
If you listen the first time, Twista raps so fast that you may only hear the chorus, “I'm calling you daddy, daddy. Can you be my daddy? Daddy, I need a daddy,” Huh!? Keep listening sis, it gets juicy. “Let me get up in your atmosphere.” There’s body worship, where Twista claims he can get it wet whatever way. He talks protectively about the feminine, “And everybody that proceed with the hatred Imma teach 'em a lesson,” and goes on to describe a saucy foreplay scene where his partner eventually catches convulsions. Twista is definitely getting off here, but the majority of the lyrics are about pleasing his partner. My girls and I cannot tell if Erika was asking for Twista to make his bodily fluids rain down on her, or if she was requesting for him to make her own bodily fluids flow. In either case, this song is from a man clearly celebrating his woman's WAP.
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